Monday, May 16, 2016

Things I Learned From An Addict: Who or What Did I Raise Anyway?

Yep, you will soon be wondering that!!! This is another part in the series of posts Things I Learned From an Addict. Today's post is about addiction and what happens when the enabling stops.

I know many are going through this today. It's a conflicting place to be, isn't it? I mean you love the person with the disease of addiction and hate the disease of addiction and what it has turned the person you love into.

In his addiction, I do not recognize him. I remember him as a child with so many dreams and aspirations and I wonder, how did things go so wrong in his life?


Stealing From You:
And they will and from others as well. When you stop enabling they will commit crimes against others as well as you- those who love them in order to get their fix for heroin and or opiates. My son told me once that he knew we wouldn't call the police on him. He was right. Would it have helped? I don't know. We only wanted our son clean and better free from the disease of addiction.

This is the beast of the drug.

Many times you will wonder just what did you raise when it feels as if their actions are right out of a made for TV movie.

Many well-meaning people tell them to stop when in fact it isn't that easy. By this point, they are mentally addicted to heroin and/or opiates.

Of course, once all of the money to enable is gone- hide all your possessions of value that mean something to you. You have to do more than hide your possessions. You need to get them out of your house because trust me if you don't, you'll be missing everything that means anything to you if you don't take all the early precautions.

Shortly after we closed the ATM is when we started noticing that small things were missing... tools, jewelry little things. My Christmas present turned up missing from under the tree two days after Christmas.

It was very subtle. I mean you come home and all the electronics, all your copper wiring, your outside central air unit are gone you know then you know you got a big problem. It wasn't like that at all!

No, these are very small items so small that it's not until you are looking for something else that you discover stuff missing.

For instance, you want to watch a movie and suddenly it's gone as well as many other DVD's have suddenly vanished.

You one day want to change your necklace and all your other jewelry has vanished from your jewelry box.

Honestly, you set there thinking who the hell did I raise? Because it will be then that it feels as if you raised a master thief.

They lie to your face
Even when you know what to call it, they will still stand and look at you and lie to your face about their addiction.
When they ask for money they will lie as to what it is needed for.

And of course, you don't know what to do at that time. You can...

Call the police?

We didn't. We only wanted our son to get better. We would deal with all of that later. We kept it private between us and family members.

Sometimes, however, depending on what was stolen from you, you really have no other choice but to report it to the police. And then the cycle starts of jail...bail being set OR jail... detox... they set for a period of time.

After adding up the total his first years in his addiction, it cost us roughly over $50,000.
Now here I am laid off again and could really use that money. On top of it, we haven't taken a vacation in over nine years and all we can afford now is a box of Calgon... To Take Us Away!!!!

Most people assume their possessions are at Pawn Shops. Not always because the dealers will take your possessions in trade for drugs. If you cannot find your things in a pawn shop it is likely they were traded with the dealer. Watch Yard Sales, Go to Flea Markets, Watch Craig's List, Go to all the Facebook Yard Sale Sites- it is likely you may be able to find your things amongst those pages.

But not always. Many dealers take your things to Baltimore to sell them too!

Now for us, this relapse is different. We are already missing our chainsaw. The hubby has said should one more item come up missing he IS filing a report with the police.

© 2016 Gossip Girl

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